quitmyscene, posting in
clucky @ 7:56pm:

I've been figuring out my options for studying abroad, and I'm hoping to go this summer, and second semester next year. Since only three students in history of the college of engineering at BU have studied abroad junior/senior year, this is pretty exciting that I've seemed to have found a way to make it work, right? Right. So you would think that this would tone down the cluckiness since I obviously would be unable to study abroad with a baby or while pregnant, right? Wrong. For whatever reason, it's just as strong. Stronger even. I understand the stronger, I think - since I met my boyfriend, I've never gone more than maybe two or three weeks without seeing him, and part of me doesn't want to leave him for six months. I know I'll forever regret it if I don't study abroad, so my "only excuse" not to is if I have a baby, then I'm stuck home with boyfriend and baby! Basically, part of me just doesn't want to be away from him for that long since I'll miss him.
I try to only bring up baby stuff when we're joking around, because I know he isn't ready and I don't want to harass him or try to pressure him into anything. Regardless, last night it was just typical joking around, turning into half seriousness..
( cut, just because it's easier to read broken up into 'paragraphs' )With that said: I think that's actually TAMED the cluckiness a bit? In hypothetical dream world, I've always wanted my first kid at 22, or at least be pregnant at that age. Since hypothetical dream world forgot about college, once I hit high school and realized that I needed to go to college to do what I want to do, I worried that it would no longer be possible but I still want my first child no later than 25. The earlier the better, but realistically, due to school, I don't think before 22 could happen. And now.. hearing him tell me that MY earliest realistic date might actually be OUR earliest realistic date? It's reassuring, to say the least.